Against the better advice of critics and Instapundit, I saw M. Night Shyamalan's "The Happening" yesterday. Rotten tomatoes was right - it was a bit of a splat.

It bugged me for the same reason movies like "The Birds," "The Wild One" bugged me. I love Hitchcock, and Tippi Hedren makes a wonderful victim, but - flocks of nasty birds are attacking a fishing village in California, and nothing can stop them from flying into homes through windows and fireplaces? You people are in a village full of fishing nets - think!

And "The Wild One", about a town attacked by motorcycle-riding toughs. Didn't they sell clotheslines at the 5 & 10...?

Early on in "The Happening", it becomes obvious that people are being affected by airborne toxins, yet no one in the movie even tries to cover their mouths with a shirt or something. They sell safety masks at CVS and at Home Depot. Wouldn't that make a little more sense than trying to outrun the wind?

..and there are machines that can help us escape the bonds of earth and outrun the wind, called 'airplanes'.

These cautionary thrillers can't work unless they make the intended victims helpless prey, and in doing so they make people appear to be dumber than mice. Sure, these things would be a threat if people were that helpless, but they're not, so what is the point?